When I think about the way I thought my life was going to go, I feel sad. It's not to say that I wont do those things, just not quite in the way that I thought I'd do them. For example I've been at university for almost 7 years and am only half way through my undergraduate degree. I will finish it one day but my health has caused me to go slow.
I had specific plans for my life. These included being as active as possible, travelling, getting my university degree over 5 years, having a career... When I think about the way I thought my life was going to go, I feel sad. It's not to say that I wont do those things, just not quite in the way that I thought I'd do them. For example I've been at university for almost 7 years and am only half way through my undergraduate degree. I will finish it one day but my health has caused me to go slow. Dreaming is good, and important. But I'm learning not to over plan my life. Instead I'm trusting God to sit in the driver's seat. The years to come are going to be a surprise and I'm excited to see what's going to happen. When I have too specific of a plan in my head, I spend time grieving the loss of that image when it doesn't come to pass. I now rather just make loose plans and enjoy the ride.
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There's this cool app on my phone that records how far I walk each day. It's really helped to motivate me and I love looking at my calendar to see what I've accomplished! I took a screen shot so I could show off! :D
I wanted to do a post about my really good friend Sarah. I've known Sarah for many years but we only recently became close when we both got really sick last year. Sarah has a very rare yet fascinating condition called EDS where her body doesn't make enough collagen to hold her joints together. As a result she dislocates her hips from walking or wakes up from sleeping with a dislocated shoulder. Her joints just fall out of place causing her an immense amount of pain. EDS also causes many other problems in her body. In addition to EDS, Sarah has a handful of other conditions including POTS! In fact if it hadn't been for Sarah, there's a good chance I never would've heard about POTS and ask to be tested for it. Feel free to check out Sarah's blog where she raises awareness about her rare conditions and shares her life. https://www.facebook.com/sarahsshout Being sick sucks. There are few upsides of being chronically ill. When I flare ups or catch a virus, sometimes I spend all day in bed. I'll be honest, it doesn't take long for me to feel depressed when this happens. One of my biggest complaints is that I feel useless. I want to be doing things, making a difference in the world, helping others... Even though there is little I can actually do while I'm incapacitated, I realized there is still a way I can make a difference to others. Having a positive attitude and counting my blessings instead of dwelling on my losses can encourage others in their circumstances. I believe that God could heal me at any moment but He hasn't because He has bigger plans for me. Something that can only be accomplished with me still being sick. Being sick has given me a new perspective on what's really important in life and has taught me how to really enjoy the small things. I've learned how to live in the moment more and appreciate how fragile life is. Being sick has shaped me as a person and I really like the person I am today. While I would DEFINITELY choose to be healthy if I had a choice, I don't regret the person I've become through living with chronic illness. |
AuthorMy name is Lisa and this is my life with POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome) Categories
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